My Misogi for the Year?

As you know, my big goal this year was to run 50 miles. I’d been training for months. The race was set for Saturday, 24th February, in Cornwall—The Arc of Attrition.

But here’s the truth: I didn’t cross the finish line.

I didn’t even show up.

The Build-Up

For two weeks leading up to the race, I was stressed. I wasn’t sleeping until 2am most nights—tossing and turning despite taking Hypnos, with restless legs that wouldn’t let me settle.

I’d wake up angry and agitated, and it threw off my focus all day.

Four Days Out

I sat in my local coffee shop, sorting out my final prep—booking accommodation and reviewing race details.

And that’s when I saw it.

A mandatory list of 22 items required to participate: head torches, backlights, specific running gear... I only had four of them.

If you didn’t have all the items, you weren’t allowed to run.

In that moment, I gave myself permission to bow out. I told myself, “It’s fine. There’s my reason. There’s my excuse not to do this.”

And honestly? I felt relief.

But deep down, I knew the truth: I wasn’t ready.

Owning My Truth

My legs weren’t ready for such an immense challenge.

My mind wasn’t ready to endure the inevitable discomfort.

In moments like this, it’s easy to fall into a trap:

• Telling yourself a defeating story
• Beating yourself up
• Spiralling into self-criticism

But this time, I didn’t let myself go there.

Since January, I’ve been practising 15 minutes of Wim Hof breathing and 10 minutes of meditation every morning (using The Way app)—a goal I set at the start of the year.

And in that moment, I could see things clearly. I could distance myself from the negativity and reframe the situation:

“This isn’t failure—it’s feedback. We will be more prepared next time.”

“You’re being loving to yourself; this is great awareness.”

A Loving Perspective

Years ago, when I crossed the finish line of my Ironman, I cried—not from joy, but from exhaustion and pain.

I had bullied my body into something it wasn’t ready for.

Yes, I finished. But at what cost?

I didn’t want to repeat that unloving mistake.

Your Misogi

Whatever your Misogi or calling is this year, remember:

• It’s worth having one. It pulls you forward. It sharpens your focus.
• It will test you. You’ll be tempted to quit. But you’ll also discover what you’re made of.
• It will transform you. Not just you—your friends and family will be inspired by the example you set.

The moment you commit to your goal, the journey begins.

And along the way, you will fail.

But how you interpret that failure is everything.

That’s why we dip our toes into the unknown—it’s where the richness of life resides.

Because growth lies ahead.
Because adventure lies ahead.

We go again.

Much love & Kia Kaha,
Chris Xx