Remember that childhood promise

“Finish your homework, and you can have ice cream later”?

A simple yet profound idea— it taught us a lesson in mindset, discipline, and the art of trade-offs.

This same principle was tested in a famous study at Stanford University, known as the Marshmallow Experiment.

Researchers placed children in a room with a single marshmallow and gave them a choice: eat it now or wait and receive two marshmallows later. 

The results were fascinating. The kids who delayed gratification and resisted the immediate temptation had better life outcomes in academic achievement, health, and financial success.

In Matthew McConaughey’s bestselling book Greenlights, he explains how he implements this theory in his life.

“Life gives us red, yellow, and green lights.“

We love green lights…on this highway of life…They say go onward…Yellow lights slow us down… A red light actually stops us in our tracks.

🔴 Red lights = obstacles, setbacks and failures.
🟡 Yellow lights = hesitation, uncertainty, or caution.
🟢 Green lights = opportunities, momentum and success.

The key? Red and yellow lights can eventually turn green.

If you’re intentional about your actions now, the more green lights you’ll hit in the future.

• If you care for your body today, you get a green light in health later.

• If you nurture relationships today, you get green lights in love and friendship later.

• If you do meaningful work now, you set yourself up for success down the road.

Juggling the past, future, and present is a constant battle we all face every day.

Personally, I like this framework:

• Be ignorant of the past.

• Be realistic about the present.

• Be delusional about the future.

Let me explain…

Part 1: The Past – A Beautiful Illusion

We love to vacation in our memories, don’t we?

The “good old days” call to us like a siren’s song, whispering tales of simpler, sweeter times.

But here’s the hard truth: the more time you spend looking backward, the less happiness you’ll find moving forward.

Yes, your past is a scrapbook of golden moments—rose-tinted, romanticised. But it’s also a ledger of failures, regrets, betrayals, and heartbreak.

And the more you live there, the more it owns you.

Part 2: The Present - Where Green Lights Are made

If the past is a fog and the future is a dream, the present is all you truly own.

You must be ruthlessly realistic about where you are today.

Ground yourself. See things as they are, not as you wish them to be.

Because if you lie to yourself about the present—if you tell yourself:

"I’m a great parent,” while your actions say otherwise...
“I’m healthy and fit,” while your habits betray you…

Then you’re living in denial, not progress.

And denial keeps you stuck.

The present is where you create your green lights.

Part 3: The Future

Now, this is where it gets interesting.

When it comes to the future, be wildly, beautifully, unapologetically delusional.

Why?

Because if you’re going to aim for something, aim BIG.

Shoot for the moon—because even if you miss, you’ll land in the stars.

Realism has its place, but not here. If you only dream within the confines of what’s "reasonable," you’ll never step beyond what’s expected.

Give yourself permission to believe in the impossible.

Because the truth is, the people who change the world aren’t the ones who “stay realistic.”

So, be delusional about the future, and you will create your greenlight moments.

The Greenlight Approach – The Regret Minimisation Framework 

Now, let’s make this practical.

How can we create as many green light moments as possible?

I want you to imagine yourself at 90 years old. 

Picture everything. What are you wearing? How does your body feel? Where are you? Who are you with?

Now ask yourself some deeper questions..

You can make them up; here are some to get you going.

What was that conversation you wish you had had?

What do you wish you tried harder at?

Which trip do you wish you had taken?

Even doing this exercise now, I feel things like…I wish I were kinder and more loving to myself and others.

Whenever you are at a crossroad or facing a decision, jump ahead to you at 90.

This framework cuts through confusion. It silences the noise. It gives you clarity.

And when you combine it with McConaughey’s Greenlight Theory, you take action today and make a better tomorrow.

Kia kaha & love,
Chris

P.S. Did you know? Hidden on Moksha, we have the words "Be Here Now." See if you can find it the next time you make yourself a cup.