Last week, I got scammed.

£600 gone in a second.

And the strange thing is, I felt it before it even happened.

I was selling a Bose sound system on Facebook Marketplace.

A very nice one, actually. It had spent the last year collecting dust in the corner of a room, so I decided it was time for it to go.

Within minutes, a message came through.

“I’d love to buy it. Only problem is, I’m based in Bournemouth. Any chance you could deliver? Happy to cover the cost.”

It was about 50 miles away.

We agreed the sale.

I spent the next hour cleaning the thing until it looked almost brand new. Wrapped it carefully in bubble wrap.

Packed everything up.

Then I got in the car.

And somewhere on that drive, I felt it.

Something was off.

I even said to my girlfriend, “I don’t know why, but this doesn’t feel right.”

Still, I carried on.

When I arrived, the guy was extremely pleasant.

Asked how the journey was. Asked plenty of questions about the speakers. Wanted to hear them working and check the sound quality.

Everything felt normal.

Then came the payment.

He entered my details.

“All gone through.”

Except it hadn’t.

I checked my account.

Nothing.

I told him the money hadn’t arrived.

He insisted it had.

I checked again.

Nothing.

And somewhere in those few seconds, it became pretty clear what was happening.

Now, I could have kicked off.

I could have started shouting.

Maybe things could have turned physical.

But in moments like that, there’s a question I find myself coming back to:

How do I want to sleep tonight?

Because everything has a cost.

Losing £600 has a cost.

But so does losing control of yourself.

So does doing something in anger that you have to carry home afterwards.

Michelle Obama famously said:

“When they go low, we go high.”

I’ve always liked that idea.

Not because going high means being weak.

And not because you should allow people to walk all over you.

It means someone else’s behaviour doesn’t get to decide yours.

Stoicism teaches something similar.

You control your thoughts and your actions.

Everything outside of that, be at peace with.

You don’t control what other people do to you.

I couldn’t control the fact that somebody decided to scam me.

But I could control how I showed up.

I took the time to clean the system properly. I packed it carefully. I drove 50 miles. I made sure they were happy with what they were buying.

None of that became meaningless just because the other person acted without integrity.

That was still the standard I chose to operate at.

And I think that matters.

Because when someone treats you badly, the temptation is to let it change how you treat others going forward.

To become a little more cynical. A little less trusting. A little less generous.

There will always be people who fall below your standards.

The real test is whether you let them lower yours.

Your standards are yours to keep.

Especially when someone gives you every reason to drop them.

Always hold your standards.

Have a great week ahead.

Kia Kaha & Love

Chris Xx